THE ONLY WAY TO FAIL

I’ve been reading some interesting information lately - some of it on fitness and some on writing, but the same theme has been coming through. I would sum up this theme as this:

The only way to fail is to give up, to quit. As long as you don’t quit, you have not failed.

Think about that.
                                   
You’re working on a manuscript, you get discouraged at some point along the way. We all do - this is normal. It’s part of the struggle. Instead of working through that difficult period (which may include days of doing nothing but moaning and pacing) - instead of working through it, you say “Screw it, I’m not finishing this manuscript.” You throw the printout in the trash and delete the files from your computer.

There will be no book now, because you have elected not to continue. Furthermore, you may have quit right before your big break through - your “AHA” moment. What if, only a few days after that you had the “aha” moment and went furiously back to work on that manuscript and wrote a bestseller!

No bestseller, though, because you didn’t wait it out and go back to work on it. You quit.

You have just FAILED.

Yep. You did.

Failure is easy on the front end. You give up and that’s it. No effort required.

Except it’s not easy - because that failure will follow you around all the length of your days. It will kick you in your backside FOREVER.

It’s like a workout program. You workout and “try” to eat right for months and one day you get on the scale and it’s been weeks since you lost a single pound. You throw in the towel and say “I’m not doing this anymore” and you go back to eating three-cheese pizzas at 10:00 at night.

You failed. Not because you didn’t lose weight for weeks, but because you gave up.

That lack of weight loss was just FEEDBACK. The feedback doesn’t constitute failure. The feedback is data -information. It’s information you can use - that is, if you don’t give up.

While you struggle through that manuscript (or whatever goal you’re pursuing) you will suffer (just as you will with weeks of no weight loss on your fitness campaign), but if you look at that data you can instead ask yourself:

“What is this telling me? What can I learn from this?”

There is always something to learn from an experience, be it bad or good. So, look at the feedback and find the positive takeaway from it. It’s there.

Don’t give up. Don’t quit.

As long as you keep going, keep learning, keep working on your goal, whatever it may be, no matter how slow the progress, you have not failed.

When you persevere, YOU ARE A SUCCESS!!

Polla filia,
J.F.

FEAR AND DOUBT

Quick post, but very important. Heed it.

Doubt is fear.

Fear is the dream killer.
       
The Dream is your Purpose.

You must fulfill your Purpose.

Fear and doubt exist only in your mind.

Fill your mind with other things!

Dream on, people! Never give up on your dreams!

Polla filia,
J.F.

NINE DAYS IN DREAMWORLD

I work two jobs. A lot of people might not consider writing to be a job, but trust me it’s a job. I’ve talked about the work of writing on this blog before; but recently I had a bit of a revelation.

Here it is: I work really hard and I seem to have gotten so used to it that I’ve turned “resting” into a reason to self-flagellate. Somehow I’ve convinced myself that working two jobs, only making time for eating, working out and sleeping before going back to work again - somehow that isn’t working that hard.

Here’s what I mean.

Writing is work - hours of research, note-taking, plotting, planning, structuring, banging keys on a computer keyboard, then reading what you wrote and revising and revising and revising.

Meanwhile, I don’t make enough money (yet) writing to pay the mortgage, so I have that pesky “day job” thing (much talked about here on this blog). I groan at the thought of it. It’s a brain drain, too, because my day job is what most people would think of as a career. It’s intense and involves a high level of responsibility.

I live for the times when I can take some of my earned vacation time from the day job and spend whole days writing. One of those times is coming up for me. I have taken 4 days of vaca after Memorial Day so I can maximize my time off. Friday (when this thing will post) is my last day in the “office” until June 3rd.

I have nine days - count ‘em - 9 whole days - NINE - wherein I can write every single day without the brain drain/interference of the damn day job! Hallelujah and amen!!

Joy. Ecstasy. Euphoria.

Dreamworld.

So, the other day while lamenting to someone about how tired I was I suddenly realized something.

I realized that if I take some measly amount of time (like 2 hours) to do something in my “free time” (after the day job day has ended) - oh, such as reading a book that isn’t for research, or driving down to the Starbucks to get a frappuccino, or anything that isn’t directly associated with my writing - if I do anything like THAT, I start hearing that tape in my head that says “you’re lazy” “you’re not getting the work done” “you talk about being a writer, but you’re not writing right now” “this is why the book isn’t finished yet” “are you ever going to finish that thing?”

Yeah. I have tapes that play like that - some mean-looking chick who resembles Cruella DeVil sitting on my shoulder griping in my ear. I now refer to her as “Tape Lady”.

People, here’s why I’m tired.

Most people have a job that takes approximately 8 hours of their day - or so - and then they spend time with their family or friends, or watch TV or a movie, go to dinner or something that involves society with other people. Hell, some people do something called “relaxing”.

???

While they are doing that I spend the rest of my waking day writing, or working on something directly related to my writing (or listening to Tape Lady). A lot of writers work like this (most of them actually), but maybe they have someone in their house to buck them up and stop their version of the Tape Lady. I don’t.

I work this much, and this hard because I don’t want to do the day job anymore (not a new sentiment). I want to write full time, and if that ever happens, it won’t happen while I watch TV, or read someone else’s books, or go to dinner with family and friends.

I know that the sooner I get this first draft done, the sooner I can start revisions, and the sooner I can start those, the sooner I can finish this book and make it great, and the sooner I can do that - well, I might just finally reach my Dreamworld for real.

So, I push.

Then I wonder why in hell I’m so tired.

That mystery is now solved, and I have told the obnoxious Tape Lady to STFU. I’m working hard enough, thank you. If I want to take a break to read or go get a frappuccino, or just drive aimlessly around the lake, then Tape Lady can go jump.

The creative brain doesn’t work without the occasional recharge.

Meanwhile, day after tomorrow I get to have 9 whole days to write, and even though I will be working, I will only be working ONE JOB - my Dream Job.

I will be working that one job while burning earned vacation days from my other job; but...

Working only one job - and having that one job be my writing?

Now THAT is a freaking vacation!!

Tonight I’m going to bed earlier than usual (before 1:00 a.m) - after I stuff a sock in Tape Lady’s mouth. Then I’m working tomorrow in the day job and after that I’m taking the phone off the hook for nine days.

I’m sure my dreams tonight will be filled with the upcoming nine days of writing bliss. Then maybe someday it won’t be just nine days. Maybe someday it will be full-time all the time in Dreamworld - with time off for goofing off with family and friends.

I hope my dreams come true, and I’m working to make that happen.

I hope all your dreams come true, too - and I hope they last for more than nine days.

Polla filia,
J. F.